Meanwhile in Florida: The Rest of America Depends on Florida to Get It Right For Once on Election Day

Florida can’t be counted on for much – except for a steady stream of weird news, massive hurricanes, and elderly people migrating there to die. But this year, we really, really need the Sunshine State to get its shit together for the presidential election.

Florida doesn’t have a great history of fair and transparent election practices. You may remember a hotly contested 2000 race between George W. Bush and Al Gore that hinged – literally – on a hanging chad (a term most voters had never heard before). We all know how that turned out. (Funny how we thought that was the end of the world; now “W” looks like a saint compared to our current Commander-in-Chief.)

This year, there’s a slight chance Florida will finally get it right. A new poll from 7News Miami and Emerson College puts Democratic presidential candidate Joe Biden six points ahead of President Donald Trump, with 51 percent of respondents favoring the Biden-Harris ticket versus 45 percent electing four more years of the same old B.S. Why the shift? It could be due to coronavirus. The state has reported 807,000 COVID-19 cases and almost 17,000 deaths from the virus.

Florida has long been a state that both indicates the direction an election will take and a deciding factor in a win. We can only hope that for once, its residents will drive their golf carts en masse to the polls and force retirement on the worst president this country has ever seen. You might not live to see the fruits of your civic duty, Floridians, but the rest of us who have decades more to live will be eternally grateful.

Cover Photo: EyeWolf (Getty Images)

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